Noo year

Merry pagan winter festival to all, and a happy 2007.

Here in the globally warmed Sweden, winter is still not present, sadly. Just watched my brother spreading his wisdom from the morning TV news show sofa. He's an expert on the Somalian conflict, which has recently flared up again.

We're preparing for a visit from a large band of Brits out to experience a proper white Christmas with sleigh rides and reindeer wandering the streets. Instead they'll be greeted by a November evening in Skegness.

On the home front we heard back from the insurers, who unsurprisingly said that unfortunately they will have nothing whatsoever to do with us, given the unjustifiable risk we represent. It really is amusing in a sad sort of way. We got sent lots of forms to explain and expand on our life style. The questions they ask betray a worrying lack of understanding. Statistically, the most risky thing that we do is driving a car. Second most risky thing, off-piste skiing for me, and horse riding for Sarah, distantly followed by climbing and diving. They didn't even ask about skiing. It's well-known that climbing is to insurers what the red rag is to a bull. This is curious, since the accident statistics presumably can be read by the insurers, as well as me.

Spin doctor

Although it's been hard for an England supporter to drum up much enthusiasm for the current Ashes series, one thing must be said.

Shane Warne is a freak. A one-off. The Johnny Mac of Cricket.

Such effortless mastery is unusual in any sport, but the guy's slightly overweight, 37, fond of a R&R life style, and yet.. seeing his delivery to Monty Panesar in the third test just blew me (and Monty) away. A Warne spin delivery is indistinguishable from magic. That slow, short run up. The gentle curve of the slow ball. The confidence of the batsman stepping out to meet it. The swing of the bat - and the ball's no longer there. It has seemingly picked up speed on the bounce, and turned almost 90 degrees and whacked into the stumps. The confused batsman looking around - where the hell did it go? Of course, Monty - aka The Sikh Tweaker - should have known better, seeing that he's a dab hand at the spin delivery himself.

Warney is set to retire from international cricket after the current whitewash of the Ashes. He goes out on top, very probably with the best wicket-taking record in cricket history.

You made cricket cool, dude.

Sjöwall Wahlöö

Been working my way through the Sjöwall-Wahlöö canon of crime novels in audio book form to whittle away the commute in the mornings. They're probably the first internationally renowned crime writers to come out of Sweden, and their influence on everyone ever since cannot be overestimated. The first thing that is striking is the wonderful portrait of Sweden in the sixties and seventies, and the overt social criticism, if not political activism, that runs like a red thread through all of the books. The Swedish cradle-2-grave wellfare state had just begun being dismantled, and S&W are not afraid to spell out the consequences that this had for many people at the time. Mostly, the criminals are treated as victims of society, and the central quartet of policemen at the 'Riksmordskommissionen' (National Murder Squad) are generally sensible, humane and oppose the carrying of side arms much for the same reason as the UK police force. The Swedish secret services are pictured as complete useless morons, and the uniformed police as either violent psychopaths or Nazis. Or both.

For me, what makes the books particularly enjoyable is that it feels like 'real' police work. These are no genius super-sleuths along the lines of Holmes or Morse. The main character, Martin Beck, frequently touches on the point that murders are more often than not solved by coincidences - a car pulled over due to a broken tail light or something. The job of the Police is toö make sure that the net of potential coincidences is as tight as possible.

The books do paint a pretty sordid picture of Sweden, but it is interesting how many of the accusations levelled are equally relevant today. Or, to put it another way, things that seem wrong in today's society were already broken 30 years ago. I frequently snigger to myself at the descriptions of corruption and incompetence that could have been taken from yesterday's papers.

The original books have all been filmed, and the characters are now franchised into a long-running series of new material not written by the original authors (Per Wahlöö has passed away). Swedish film maker Bo Widerberg made the middle book - Den vedervärdige mannen från Säffle - into a wonderful film in 1976, but the newer fayre is of varying quality.

The series of books have influenced everyone from Mankell, Larsson and Nesser, especially Mankell with his equally thinly veiled social commentary.

Head hunters

So there I was, just back in the office after a long day of interviews for the development team. Phone goes. Female voice:

"Is that Mr Karma Police?"

I say that it is indeed, thinking it'd be the guys from HR who've helped me with recruiting. It isn't.

"We have a role for the technical lead for a large publishing company, lots of money, big budget to run the on line department's development arm, you interested?"

I am now very confused, seeing that she's just described my current position, all six weeks of it. I throw my boss next to me a sneaky look, thinking that he's started to look for my replacement already. He shakes his head, vigorously. I ask the lady who she's hiring for, and if she's sure that it's not my job she's trying to recruit me for. She's now confused. I ask how the hell she managed to get hold of my number, seeing that I don't actually know it myself yet.

"Sorry, that's confidential, but we want to do phone interviews tomorrow if you're interested"

I start laughing.

"I'm flattered, but as I've only been in this job for one paycheck so far, I think I should stick it out a bit longer.."

So, anyone wanting to shed some light on this? Maybe the competition is really that brash. Or, which is more likely, I really am incredibly talented :)

Random observation: whilst typing these words I'm watching the British Comedy Awards on telly. Seeing Sacha Baron Cohen out of character is kind of freaky. Borat couldn't make it, as he was doing the key note at the Holocaust Deniers' Conference, apparently.

The insurance comedy is on-going. Big forms arrived with questions written by people who don't understand what climbing means, and certainly aren't remotely qualified in assessing the risks involved. Statistically, cragging is incredibly safe. My sole injury even remotely associated with climbing in the last 10 years is a broken leg, slipping on a rock on the beach, walking in to a route at Portland. Oh, and tennis elbow.

Pinochet

Chilean butcher Pinochet has finally joined the Fletcher Memorial Home for Incurable Tyrants and Kings. And not a day too early - missed only by Maggie Thatcher. On the home front, BBC's Sports Personality of the Year gong went to Zarah Phillips for her world and Euro titles in eventing. Not wanting to diminish her achievement, but the sports personalities have been a bit thin on the ground the last year. One thing seemed certain though - the England rugby union squad was unlikely to be in contention.

Ouch!

This has gotta hurt

F6c+

Sarah completed her F6c+ project down the wall the other night in smooth style. I will now have to watch my back as she's climbed every route I have climbed so far this year. Very worrying trend indeed. We also completed our mortgage application with the usual fun and games when it comes to insurance.

"Oh, you climb? No problem. Do you climb harder than Severe, or on routes not protected by bolts?"

Please. Severe? My 3yo niece can climb Severe.

"Eeh, oh well, we'll have to consult further. At least you never climb unroped?"

Very tempting to pull out that picture of Sarah astride "The Hunk" in Bishop.

"Skiing, diving, horse riding?"

He'll get back to us, he said.

On the home front we're celebrating Maud's birthday today. Big up to you, and see you soon. It is indeed incredible that Christmas is upon us again.

Top 2%

According to that beacon of information accuracy, Slashdot, two percent of the world's population accounts for half the world's wealth. At the same time, the UK is planning to spend £20 billion on new nuclear missiles and associated subs. That's a lot of greenbacks in anyone's book. Now, I've never quite managed to get my head around the UK's need for a nuclear deterrent, especially since it's not even independent. For a launch, the UK has to ask, cap in hand, the US for the codes. The French, on the other hand, can nuke anyone they want, no questions asked. But back to the confusion - in a post cold war world, Empire days well and truly over - is this really the best way to spend £20bn of taxpayers' money?

Swimming lesson

I'm a rubbish swimmer. I can't do front crawl, at least not whilst breathing. Sarah's in contrast a paragon of grace and style in the pool, and she arranged for me to attend a Front Crawl Clinic at the university pool. At first this was pretty daunting, given that everybody was expertly crawling up and down, bar me. I was thrashing my way half way up the pool, and to add insult to injury, was captured on video for later analysis. The lady running the clinic kindly gave me a pair of flippers which (obviously) made an enormous difference. Suddenly I could actually take on board some of the teaching when I didn't have to fight so hard just to stay afloat and move forwards. Towards the end of the hour I was videoed again, and with a bit of imagination one could see some improvement.

Vote Bill

BillG for prez

Henke

Henke Larsson on loan to ManU? Fergie is obviously serious in wanting to win the league..